About the Stranger on Your Train

No, I won’t move over to the seat across the aisle. That’s right, asshole—I’m sitting with you on this train the whole fucking way. And no, I’m not gonna shut up about my pathetic train-riding life. No, I won’t let you talk to your fucking girlfriend on your fucking iPhone—you’re gonna listen to me tell you about my first prison tattoo, and your girlfriend can get onto this train and kiss my fat fucking ass if she has a problem with that. Oh, you’re planning the wedding? Oh, how sweet, how cute, how pretty and nice—fucking asshole. Now move over, you’re in my space.